Best Buddies

11.12.2016 Welcome Brunch With the Buddies

We have arranged a meet-up dinner with our buddies to get to know each other better and have a good time. Since we did this activity at school on a Saturday afternoon, we took permission from the IB coordinator to use the dining hall. The meeting was at 12.30pm but we went to school at 10am to be ready. We started by arranging the tables so that every Eyuboglu student would be able to sit with their buddies and everybody could see and communicate with each other. We did this by combining two long tables in the middle of the dining hall so we would have some free space as well. After arranging the table, everybody put the food they brought on a table (we made that table the service table) and started transferring the food to service plates. The brunch would be open buffet so everybody could take what they want. When all the arrangements were made we thought of the activities we could do with our buddies after eating. Everybody had some suggestions. We finally agreed on doing a christmas sweepstake since new year was right around the corner. 

Our buddies arrived around 1.30pm because they were stuck in traffic. When they arrived each student hugged they buddy and all and then we went eating. While I was talking with my buddy, I realised that he was in to football just like I was. When we found a common hobby we started chatting about it. We both asked us what was the team we supported, favourite players, even our favourite kits. We didn’t understand how time passed and all of a sudden, my buddy and the other male buddies wanted to play football. We had only thirty minutes remaining but even then we managed to get permission from their head teacher and then me, three of my friends and our buddies went to play football. It was such an enjoyable 4 on 4 match where Eyuboglu students faced the buddies and the buddies beat us. They were playing really well. When we finished the match all eight of us were tired but happy at the same time. This was surely a memory that I won’t forget for a long time.

We headed back to the dining all and pulled names from the christmas presents list. Then we said goodbye to our buddies and watched them get onto their school bus. My feelings after our buddies left was hard to write about because I was feeling extremely happy but sad at the same time. I was happy because I got to know amazing people in our buddies but this was only a yearly program and that was the issue what made me sad. I had a special bond between me and my buddy Aybars since day one but when June comes up it was going to be over. I’m definitely continue to be in touch with my buddy even when the program is over but still the reality of “Best Buddies” going to end in June is making me miserable. I can easily predict that this program will develop me into a more caring and emotional person.

12.02.2017 Watching our Buddies Perform a Theatre Play

We were invited to watch the theatre play called “Pirtlatan Bal” that will be performed by our buddies. The buddies performed an amazing play, it made me proud to watch my buddy memorise his quotes and act his role out. This play made me realise that a person is able to accomplish everything he wants to. Our buddies had  mental disabilities to some extent but they were always saying their aspire in becoming actors. Today, by showing perseverance and commitment and by hard work, they pulled through a magnificent play which everybody clapped on their feet at the end. After this day, I asked myself the question: Why am I finding excuses for things I can actually do? I promised myself that I will stop being lazy and be aggressive to reach my aims.

15.04.2017 Super Fun Time With Our Buddies

So me and my Buddy were obviously texting each other or talking on the phone on a regular basis but we had formed a special bond between each other so texting haven’t satisfied us. One day we both decided to talk with our friends from our schools to arrange an activity day. Luckily for both of us, the planning process of the arrangement went pretty quick so in a blink of an eye, they were with us at our school. We had cliche activities planned such as painting or eating outside, etc. but no, me and my buddy were beyond cliches and we wanted to have real fun. So we kindly asked/ sneaked in to the Physical Education department to get they keys of the open soccer field because soccer was widely loved among the best buddies. After we finger painted the “Best Buddy Board” and lunch we went to have a blast of a match. The key point and the most fun part of the game was that not only the boys have played. As a group, with mixed teams of best buddies and Eyuboglu students, and boys and girl;s played all together. We drew at the end and let the everlasting friendship leave the pitch victorious. 

From this day I had a couple of personal implications. I was thinking that friendship isn’t just how you spend time together or share moments, it is about having special bonds between each other so someone could form a very strong friendship without regularly seeing a person. Me and Aybars’ friendship was over the limit. Sure we weren’t seeing each other every day but we were trusting each other and whenever a problem had occurred, I know we could just talk until one of us changes his mood. The Best Buddies program helped me find a pure friend that I can only have fun and spend good time with him. Secondly, Aybars taught me to look at the world from a positive perspective. He wasn’t the most talented soccer player nor the most physically fit but his passion for the game surpassed all physical features and he actually played better than any one of us. Just from watching him, I learned to stop complain about unimportant issues and focus on the work I’ll be doing with passion and energy. So after this day, I had developed new mental skills which I had just explained, no more moaning just doing what I love.

23.12.2017 The Closing Ceremony

Sadly, every activity has a time to end; happily, the ending means new open doors. Now that the “school activity” part of best buddies is over we could hang out with my buddy without getting permission from either one of our schools. So actually, all the obstacles that prevented us from meeting each other vanished as the program is over. The ending ceremony was emotional as it had to be. We went to the stage together with my buddy to get our certificates. I was proud of myself but more importantly I was so so so proud of my buddy as he went through this whole year of the project and became my BEST BUDDY. While we were chit chatting, we talked about the activities we had done so far or the things we had talked on the phone. I couldn’t help myself get emotional because we’ve been to a lot together, literally and now seeing us finishing what we started is just an euphoric feeling. Nothing but blessings at the end of this project. Our last hug wasn’t a good bye it was a see you next month bro hug ;). 

This project had various CAS learning outcomes on my behalf:

Increased Awareness of Strength and Areas for Growth: I want to study psychology in University because the human brain, cognitive sciences and the way actions of a being is done really amazes me. By attending this project, I realised that communicating with somebody with autism wasn’t hard as I expected and I was actually good at it. Throughout the year I was talking with Aybars, I have never had a hard time choosing my words, I have never offended him nor told him things he couldn’t understand. I realised that I somehow had the ability to talk successfully with people with many different personalities and mindsets.

Undertaking new challenges: I’ve never known a person with autism before. I’ve never spoken to one as well. So this friendship project, overall, was entirely a brand new challenge for me. This was an unfamiliar activity to me but luckily I had formed a special bond with my friend Aybars and the challenge turned up to be a successful best friend relationship. 

Planned and Initiated Activities/ Working Collaboratively with others: This outcome was the creativity part of this CAS project. Because Best Buddies was a student oriented project, we had to arrange all the meetings, contact our buddies’ schools and plan the activities that we would be doing in the meetings. We haven’t done a sufficient division of labor. We had a WhatsApp group and everybodies’ ideas were taken into consideration and whichever made more sense was chosen in the end. This part of the project made me use every bit of creativity in my brain because we would have to find activities that the kids will like and not hurt them. So we were even careful in the choices of food. This process was the collaborative part of our work because we had made the decision making as a team.

Showing Perseverance and commitment: The only major problem I faced in this project was to motivate the buddies whose Eyuboglu student partner didn’t show up for some reason. The buddies, obviously, felt left out but (I had done this twice, all of us were doing it) took the buddy whose partner didn’t come with us and acted as if I/ we were their partner. I realised that I was acting defensive for the benefit of the buddies because if they felt sad I was also feeling sad but also anger towards the partner who haven’t done his/ her responsibilities.

Engaged with issues of global importance: People with autism is common in the global and local society of my country and I feel like there aren’t many campaigns done to raise awareness of their situation or just accept them as a part of the society without distinguish them as different. So attending a project about being friends with a child with autism was perfect for me to both understand their feelings and contribute to their lives.

Consideration of ethical implications: There is ethics in CAS there is ethics in every aspect of life. In this project there was a thin line of ethics between the buddies and the studies. The buddies were so hyped up and energetic so they wanted to whatever they saw at our school or they wanted to meet us outside school which was against the policy of the project. Without being rude and making them sad we had to deny a little part of their wants by providing them new opportunities which we could do to make them happy.